Happiness and Sadness

Five days ago ...my youngest and only daughter celebrated her twelve birthday . How time flies . Twelve years ago ...she was just a tiny little bundle of joy in my arms . I delivered her thru the C section . Compared to her two elder brothers , her birth weight was the lightest at only 3.25 kg . She came with an abundance of thick black hair . Of course , the usual baby smell came as a package .

I must say her arrival was a consolation to my father , brothers and sisters and myself.....as we had lost my mother a few days earlier prior to her birth . I was indeed heartbroken when my mother passed away . I was looking forward to spend my post natal period with her . Yasmin would have been my mother's first granddaughter ; from her daughter ..that is me .

I remembered receiving the call at 3am from my nephew . I remembered I did not break down and cried immediately . It was another five seconds later that I let myself go and sobbed .......Then I woke up my sister in law and my husband .

We had actually planned to drive down to my hometown on that day too .How I wished God had allowed us the time to be with each other for the last time . Just a couple of hours more ..... But it was not meant to be . God loved her more and she was taken away as God had promised ...not a second earlier nor a second later .

Come December ...it is a feeling of sorts for me . A celebration for Yasmin . Alhamdullillah ....she is a healthy girl and growing up normally for a girl her age . Of course at this age , the changing hormones within her body is making me and her to work hard to understand the sudden mood swings . Its just never easy growing up .

On the other hand December is also a sad month for me. I would reflect the moments I had with my mother .So full of beautiful memories .....I wish I could continue making memories with her. Its just so easy to remember the number of years she left us .She must be happy and glad that my daughter inherited her name ....Fatimah . My husband added another name Yasmin....so my daughter's full name is Yasmin Fatimah . My daughter is proud of her name and said its such a beautiful name .