It was once one of those days when my only daughter felt chatty enough to tell me about her friends . During the course of this conversation she was telling about a particular friend whose relationship with her mother is not like the normal .........yunno a mother and daughter relationship. My daughter said , " They treat each other as friends "
I was asking ' What sort of friends ? "
" I don't actually know ," said daughter ." But I think friends like me and her ...she and her friends . That kind of thing lah . "
That certainly had me thinking for a while . I heard of this before where there are certain parents who thought that their approach in raising up their chidren is more of " as friends ". That's fine for me after all that is their way ....if they are comfortable with that and it works for them ...that's fine .
Me ? My hubby ? Honestly we never discussed about the sort of approach we should raise up our children . There was never a parenting talk that we attended . It was more like ...we brought these children into this world .......so it is our responsibility that they grew up with proper food , clothes and shelter .......plus education and to be counter balanced with a very good dose of Islam values in them . Most parents would like their children to be good citizens .......to contribute to society and the country . I mean how many parents out there want their children to be gangsters and rob and kill people along the way ?
I can't imagine how I would be like if I treat my daughter as a friend .
A friend ? Gee ........aren't friends are supposed to be like .......we can borrow each others clothes ? We can talk and gossip about that particular person ?...and if I go partying and drink and if my daughter do that its okay ........after all we are friends ? What if both of us had a tiff and called each others names plus the bad mouths ...gosh every Tom , Dick and Harry plus Minah and Timah and Piah will know about my household . Perhaps we will never talk to each other .......and that will make my daughter as .......motherless ?
Then where and who is her mother ? Who is going to guide her .........? Where is the respect I deserve ........after all my blood and her father's runs in those veins of hers and not her friend's blood .
No .....I can never be my daughter's friend ....I will face whatever squabbles both of us will encounter along the way ...I will not shrink my duties as a mother .
I hope .....Insyaallah .....I will get my daughter's respect and guide her. Definitely there will come a time when we both will go separate ways and when that time comes she is ready to face the world and be on her own feet .
I was asking ' What sort of friends ? "
" I don't actually know ," said daughter ." But I think friends like me and her ...she and her friends . That kind of thing lah . "
That certainly had me thinking for a while . I heard of this before where there are certain parents who thought that their approach in raising up their chidren is more of " as friends ". That's fine for me after all that is their way ....if they are comfortable with that and it works for them ...that's fine .
Me ? My hubby ? Honestly we never discussed about the sort of approach we should raise up our children . There was never a parenting talk that we attended . It was more like ...we brought these children into this world .......so it is our responsibility that they grew up with proper food , clothes and shelter .......plus education and to be counter balanced with a very good dose of Islam values in them . Most parents would like their children to be good citizens .......to contribute to society and the country . I mean how many parents out there want their children to be gangsters and rob and kill people along the way ?
I can't imagine how I would be like if I treat my daughter as a friend .
A friend ? Gee ........aren't friends are supposed to be like .......we can borrow each others clothes ? We can talk and gossip about that particular person ?...and if I go partying and drink and if my daughter do that its okay ........after all we are friends ? What if both of us had a tiff and called each others names plus the bad mouths ...gosh every Tom , Dick and Harry plus Minah and Timah and Piah will know about my household . Perhaps we will never talk to each other .......and that will make my daughter as .......motherless ?
Then where and who is her mother ? Who is going to guide her .........? Where is the respect I deserve ........after all my blood and her father's runs in those veins of hers and not her friend's blood .
No .....I can never be my daughter's friend ....I will face whatever squabbles both of us will encounter along the way ...I will not shrink my duties as a mother .
I hope .....Insyaallah .....I will get my daughter's respect and guide her. Definitely there will come a time when we both will go separate ways and when that time comes she is ready to face the world and be on her own feet .
1 comment:
I never would count parents as friends. Parents are not friends, their more than friends, their our parents. If that doesnt make sense, then what does?
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